Twenty Questions
by Queen Readalot
Summary: Twenty questions Naruto has asked, twenty answers he's recieved and twenty moments he's shared. Naruto-centric, various genres, rated T for language, some AU events, no pairings intended. Oneshot.


(**A/N: Yeah, just a fic in the "20-truths" format, in no particular order and of different lengths. Some are kind of random, but that's kind of the point of these sometimes. It's a tribute to Naruto for his birthday, so a Happy (very) Belated Birthday to you, Naruto! For the rest of you, enjoy!)**

**Disclaimer: **These are cruel. Who came up with them, anyway? *sighs* Me no own Naruto.

**Bold font**= Kyuubi/Nine tailed fox talking

Twenty Questions 

* * *

><p><strong>1.<strong> "Am I… am I _really_…?"

Hiruzen Sarutobi takes a puff of his ancient pipe, age spots on his face crinkling as his face screws up in thought. He stares down the blond child before him, smoke curling around his face in growing clouds.

The boy's head is bowed; he gazes at the floor with expressionless blue eyes that seem to be waiting for the dreaded answer. The answer he fears to be the truth. The answer that Sarutobi must give him.

The Third Hokage, aware that a long pause would be disheartening for the boy's morale, takes the pipe out of his mouth and breathes one final smoky wisp into the air. He sighs, having practiced for this talk ever since the child was born. Now, however, the words seem to have trouble coming out of his mouth. He deliberates for a second, ponders the best way he can word this. Finally, he clears his throat.

"Yes,"

The boy's head snaps up, shock covering his features, eyes widening in a sudden despair…

"And no." Sarutobi hastens to add, setting the still smoking pipe on the paper-covered desk. Not a smart move, he belatedly notes.

At the twelve-year-old's confused stare, Sarutobi elaborates. He makes sure to stress the difference between the _demon _and its _container_, and how they are most certainly _not _the same. He tells of his successor's sacrifice and of how he wanted the blond child to be a _hero_. He states the truth and the facts as clearly as he can, keeping his voice even and neutral. He explains everything. (Well, everything the newly-minted Genin needs to know at this point in time, at any rate.)

The old man glances at his young friend with concern. "Do you understand?" He asks calmly, pushing back his chair. With a _creak_ of his now-old bones, Sarutobi stands and crosses the desk to kneel next to the blond child. Something he's never done before. He repeats the question, this time with a little more force. "Do you understand?"

Naruto's gaze is redirected to the floor, blue eyes glazing over with some complex emotion. He doesn't answer. He doesn't even move for a long, long time.

* * *

><p><strong>2. <strong>"What'cha doing?"

One lazy brown eye cracks open, pinning the intruder with a glare as piercing as he is willing to make it. The figure is just a silhouette against the blue sky, his shadow falling across the once nearly-dozing teen. He shifts his arms from around his head and turns away, unwilling to answer and break his silence.

The sun is suddenly back in his face as the figure moves, orange outfit now unbearably bright without the help of his shadow. The pineapple haired boy grimaces, closing his eyes and hoping that his Leaf comrade will leave him in peace.

Sadly, this is not to be.

"Hey! Shikamaru, I asked you a question!"

And now the whiskered face is annoyingly close to his face, a finger reaching out to poke his cheek. "Don't fall asleep on me, you lazy lump!" The persistent voice booms out, sounding almost nasally in its exasperation. "I know you're faking!"

Shikamaru remains silent. He's patient, he can wait until the nap-stealer gives up. Knowing this particular _persona non grata_, that may very well take a while. Too bad. He has time.

The voice is quieted, giving Shikamaru a few minutes of blissful silence. He almost gives a content sigh and stretches his arms behind his head. He doesn't. It's way beyond troublesome to give up his charade now.

The silence is broken as the voice sounds out again, a smug tone underlying its words. "If you don't talk to me now, I'll tickle you. I mean it."

Crap. That is such a _drag_.

The brown eyes shoot open just in time to see his blond friend leaning over him, grinning evilly with his hands outstretched, fingers wiggling. Keeping his cool, Shikamaru answers briskly "Cloud-watching."

The blond pauses, fingers retracting and arms falling back to his sides. "See?" He exclaims triumphantly. "I knew you were awake." Instead of leaving, as Shikamaru hopes he would, Naruto straightens from his crouch with a contemplative look on his face. The fifteen-year-old blond walks around Shikamaru's prone figure on the grassy hill.

Shikamaru blinks in surprise as the blue-eyed teen lowers himself on the ground in a position symmetrical to his own, so that the tops of their heads are nearly touching. "Hmm." Naruto exclaims, wriggling a bit to get comfortable. "The grass tickles."

Shikamaru acquiesces this statement with the slightest nod that he knows Naruto can feel. Danger over, the brunet teen directs his gaze skyward once more, watching the puffy white shapes drift across the sky.

The hush of the forest is nice while it lasts. "You know," Naruto says conversationally, bobbing his head up and down. "This is actually kinda relaxing. I can see why you do this all the time. It's quiet, easy and the least troublesome thing I can think of."

Shikamaru grunts his version of a "True that, yo." and decides to just let Naruto speak. It would be a drag to shut him up. The blond seems a bit uneasy now, as if deciding what to say next.

"I know I'm bothering you." Is the statement Naruto settles for. "But I was passing by and saw you, and just had to ask. Plus I really, really hate being ignored, you know? So, yeah. I'm sorry. Thanks for answering anyway." The spiky-haired boy doesn't comment with the sarcastic proclamation that appears in the mind. He knows the (admittedly one-sided) conversation has taken a serious turn. His expression softens a little.

Another small silence, and just when Shikamaru is convinced that the impossible has happened, a newly rejuvenated voice pipes up "Hey, hey! That one looks just like a fluffy bunny rabbit with a bow tie, dattebayo!"

Repressing a groan (_Not _a sudden urge to smile. Not at all) Shikamaru nods.

"Yeah. It does."

* * *

><p><strong>3. <strong>"Who?"

Tsunade panics. "Naruto. I said good job, _Naruto_. Could you give me your report please?"

Naruto shakes his head, cerulean eyes narrowing in suspicion. "You did not say Naruto. I know my name when I hear it, Grandma. A future Hokage like me is observant, see Baa-chan?"

_Hey, Nee-san! Big sis, you are the best!_

_I'm going to be the best Hokage ever! Just you wait and see!_

"So, who's this Nawaki, or whoever?"

A restrained sob battles its way up her throat. "Nobody, kid." Her face crumples. "Nobody."

* * *

><p><strong>4. <strong>"Iruka-sensei, Iruka-sensei! How are babies made?"

Iruka stops short, whirling around at the most dreaded question in history. His shinobi-trained brain assimilates the information in his mind, pulling up all possible responses and possibilities. First order of business: find the kid that did it.

Innocent, cerulean eyes look back into his. There's a big smile on the whiskered face, and the blond hair falls about his eyes in messy tangles. His eight-year-old mind believes this question is extremely intelligent, and he looks intensely curious. He looks somewhat out of place in the playground, where the Academy sends its students for their morning break.

Iruka stifles a groan. Ah, shoot. Not _that _kid!

Okay, so he isn't as bad as everyone thinks he is. He doesn't destroy buildings and kill people. Iruka's parents are not dead because of him. He's just the jailer, an innocent who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. He is not the Kyuubi itself, Iruka knows that now.

But _still_. Habits are hard to break, and seeing the kid's whiskery face up close (like now) still gives Iruka's heart a small throb as he remembers his parents and the terrible night they died. There is also a small space in his heart that still burns with hatred, calls for the death of the monstrous demon inside Naruto. But not for Naruto himself. Not anymore.

And now, just as he's getting more comfortable around the kid, he has to go and ask a question like that. Iruka knows it's his responsibility to tell his students things like this. So, he decides to go for it. He glances at his impatient young student and flashes a tight smile, ignoring the poisonous looks he (Mostly, the boy) are getting from the staff around him. "A stork brings them in, Naruto."

Naruto frowns, then starts to speak…loudly. "Nuh-UH, Iruka-sensei! That's a big lie! Old Man Hokage told me that they get dropped down a chimney!" His grin stretches, innocence suddenly diminishing slightly at the mischief shining in his eyes. "But you can't fool me! See, see, I noticed that just before babies arrive that their mom's stomachs get _reaaaal _big." Little hands stretch out to demonstrate. "So, they can't be brought by storks 'cause storks don't make people fat!"

Iruka's eye twitches, a red tint flushing his cheeks. Schooled by an eight-year old. _Damn it. Little punk._

Naruto looks so happy at having one-upped his sensei; a smile spreads across his face and his eyes light up with laughter. "So," He continues with glee. "I wanna know! Please tell me, Iruka-sensei! Pleeeease!"

Iruka is about to bark out a very loud "No!" when he realizes the glares they are receiving have increased tenfold at the kid's loud insisting. Naruto seems to be ignoring them for the moment, his attention fixed firmly on his teacher.

Iruka pauses for a second, and then stretches out a hand to the boy. "Come on." He says with a sigh. "Let's go inside. We've got a lot to talk about."

Because, Iruka thinks as the small hand slides into his own, if he doesn't, then who will?

* * *

><p><strong>5. <strong>"Wait…aren't _you _blonde too?"

Ino blushes. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Naruto smirks, gleefully elaborating for her. "There is no way that blonde joke counts, Ino Yamanaka, because _you _are a blonde too!"

A sudden silence descends on the big table in what is fondly known as "Team Asuma's BBQ". Twelve sets of eyes stare at the two fair-haired, blue-eyed teens that sit facing each other, one glaring, one smirking.

As one, the group bursts out laughing. The table is pounded, tears run down people's faces and chairs are squeaked back. Even the stoic ones crack a grin, and Sai provides more entertainment with a small, rarely-heard chuckle.

Ino is absolutely mortified. "Shut up!" She yells, face turning even redder. "It was an honest mistake! I wasn't thinking!"

Kiba is barely breathing, one hand pressed on his chest. "I think you're right on the money, Ino!" He howls, breaking into another snigger. "Blonds _are _dumb! We have two living, breathing examples sitting right in front of us!"

An indignant "Hey!" coming simultaneously from the two blonds present only brings up another round of fresh laughter.

* * *

><p><strong>6. <strong>"Hello. Do you remember me?"

Chains clank as the prisoner in the corner stirs. Small dark eyes squint from underneath dirty gray bangs and they stare at the new arrival for the slightest second before lighting up in recognition. The small mouth turns up into a slight smirk and the figure lets loose a small, crazed laugh.

"Ah, of course. You. How could I forget?" The man says, looking the blond figure up and down. "I must say, you have grown quite a bit. Not as shrimpy as you once were, huh?" The smirk slowly dissolves into a frown. "Just how long has it been? A year? Two years?" The prisoner shakes his head and sighs. "Doesn't matter. Doesn't change a thing, you know. I'm still the same and you, well…" Here a note of malice is made clear in the man's voice. "…you're still the same too."

The blond teen, leaning against the bars of the jail cell, interjects something quietly. "No. I'm different now. I'm a hero. I've saved the village. I'm…not the same. I've been acknowledged."

The grey-haired man lets loose another laugh, the madness in his eyes shining clearly. "This village has gone insane," He chuckles. "to even give you an ounce of acknowledgment. Hero? Pah! _You _are not a hero. You never will be. No matter how many times you are "acknowledged", no matter how many times you save this village, you can't change a thing. You're still you. A ravaging demon that should have been put down the instant it was vulnerable."

Looking very tired, the blond backs up from the cell and shuts his eyes. "You still don't get it, do you? After all this time, you still don't understand." Sad blue eyes look into hateful dark ones. "I'm not the Kyuubi, Mizuki-sensei. I never was."

Mizuki's grin disappears. Suddenly, he is in a psychotic rage. "You are the cause of this village's problems! You destroyed it! You killed people! And yet they let you roam about, claiming to be a hero? Nonsense! _I _could have been a hero that night! I could have ended you! Once a monster, always a monster! You want to do the village a favor, Naruto Uzumaki?" The man spits out the question. "Then go die!"

Naruto's face is impassive. "You're crazy. You're so caught up in your hatred that you have no idea what you've become." The blond squats down on the damp floor, coming eye-to-eye with his former sensei. "I'm sorry." He says sincerely, surprising the gray-haired man into silence. "I didn't save you. You're beyond saving now."

Mizuki's eyes light up with fury again, and he spits into the blonde's face. "I don't need your pity." He snarls frighteningly. "Why are you here anyway, brat? Come to rub in my face your victory? That I am locked up and you are free, when it should be the opposite?"

The steady stream of spittle drips down a whiskered cheek. Naruto makes no move to wipe it off. "I've come to thank you." He finally admits, straitening up and looking into Mizuki's eyes again. "The way you revealed the reason I was hated, your timing, the fact that you led me to the scroll that contained my favorite jutsu: that's all built me into the person I am now. So thanks. Without you, I would still be the dead-last loser."

Mizuki smirks. "Funny." He drawls, face turning malicious. "I was hoping for the exact opposite."

Naruto ignores the interruption. "I also want to apologize." He says, almost ashamedly. "I'm sorry that you're in here and aren't getting better. I'm sorry you hate so much. Because you're right: _you_ haven't changed. You don't allow yourself to."

A guard pokes his head into the corridor. "Visiting hours are over." He says politely. "Please, Uzumaki-san, Hokage-sama wants to see you. I'll escort you there."

Naruto nods, turning away from the jail cell. "Thanks." He says distractedly, looking back at Mizuki uncertainly. An orange sleeve lifts and unconsciously wipes off the spit on his cheek. "I'll leave in a second."

The guard nods and exits the room, leaving Naruto and Mizuki alone once more. "Well," Naruto starts, scratching the back of his head. "That's all I wanted to say." He fixes the gray-haired man with a nervous stare that Mizuki realizes he's never seen before. He notes it must have taken almost all the brat's courage to visit him. Naruto nods, acknowledging his silence. "See ya later, Mizuki-sensei!" He pipes up, turning on his heel and exiting the room without looking back.

It is then, staring at the Jinchuuriki's retreating back, that Mizuki grasps that, for the tiniest _second_, _he _is the monster and the brat is the man. That Naruto Uzumaki and the Kyuubi are not one and the same. That he was _wrong_.

Then the feeling is gone, and Mizuki sneers. "Good riddance, brat." He says maliciously to the recently vacated room. "I will _never _acknowledge a monster as a ninja, comrade or Hokage."

The door slams shut, and he is alone once more.

* * *

><p><strong>7. <strong>"Did you know you were the first?"

"The…the first? Really?"

Naruto smiles. It's a sad smile. "Yeah. No one's ever said that to me before, you know? That's why…that's why I guess I've been a major jerk about it. You deserve an answer. I'm sorry that I didn't answer you right away."

Hinata blushes, fiddling with the material on her jacket. "It's okay." She says shakily. "You were busy. You had just saved the village, and were working on rebuilding it right afterwards. And you left immediately after that. So it wasn't your fault, really. I under…"

"No." Naruto shakes his head. "That's no excuse. I could have looked for you. I didn't." He pauses, looking over his new desk at Hinata. "I mean, I thought you'd _died_. It was one of the most awful things I have ever experienced." Hinata's face falls, and he quickly backtracks. "No, no, it's not _that _that was awful, it's what happened right after. What you said was _good_. I mean…" He stops, sighs, and runs his fingers through his hair. "I'm really making a mess of this, huh?"

Hinata can't help but smile at the familiar behavior. "I understand what you mean, Naruto. I really do." Her voice comes out clearly, not confident, but without the stutter. This moment…it's too important for her to let her nervousness get in the way now.

Naruto smiles back at her, the big, bright smile she knows and loves. "Yeah. Thanks." He pauses, diverting his gaze to stare uncomprehendingly at the paper covering his desk. "Anyway, I want to tell you my answer." He takes a deep breath. "Thank you, but…"

Hinata's heart drops down to her shoes. _No. No, please no. _

"…I don't have an answer." Naruto finishes, unaware of her momentary heartbreak. "I don't know what my feelings are anymore. A few years ago, I was certain. But now, everything's all jumbled up. It's like…after everything that has happened, I've lost something, you know?"

He looks at her expectantly, almost pleadingly. She nods meekly, whispering a small "Yes" as she resists the urge to cry. Her hands tremble in her lap, so she clenches them into fists. It isn't an outright rejection, she knows that, but it still hurts to hear.

Naruto, it seems, isn't done yet. "I have more to say." He says, leaning forward so that his eyes capture hers in the intensity of his stare. "I want to say: thank you, Hinata. Thank you so much. You don't know how much it meant to me when you said those words." To Hinata's momentary dull surprise, Naruto's cheeks had a subtle red stain spreading over them. "I just…I was so _happy_, dattebayo!"

Suddenly, he gives a small frown and diverts his gaze to the window overlooking the village. "That sounds totally selfish. I'm sorry, again. But you should know, that meant so much to me. I'll never forget it. Just remember Hinata: no matter what, you will always be one of my precious people." He sounds anxious, but totally sincere.

Hinata doesn't know what to say. She doesn't even know where to start. Her thoughts and feelings are teeming with so many emotions that all she feels is a kind of dull confusion.

And then Naruto turns back to her and flashes his huge grin, and she just knows everything is going to be okay.

* * *

><p><strong>8. <strong>"So…wind style, huh?"

Asuma blinks, sprinkling ashes from his burnt cigarette on the ground. "Yup." He acquiesces after a second, rifling around in his pocket for another stick.

Naruto is sitting cross-legged on a large rock, examining the deep gouges left by his chakra-coated weapons. He seems totally enraptured with the markings, repeatedly running his fingers on the rough gashes. Asuma is a bit puzzled by this, but then again, Naruto is kind of odd. So he files this as one of his many quirks and accepts his strange behavior.

It's quiet for a few more minutes, and then:

"THIS IS SO FREAKIN' AWESOME!"

Asuma winces, startled by the sudden loud exclamation by the number one _loudest _ninja he has ever met. Naruto is now dancing around, whooping for all he's worth.

"That is so COOL! Who knew that something like wind could do _that_? Think of all the possibilities! Man, why didn't anyone tell me about this before? Wow, wow, WOW! I am so totally psyched right now, dattebayo!" Naruto is practically vibrating now, bouncing up and down like he's been electrocuted. All Asuma can think is "Who the hell fed that kid so much sugar?"

Naruto (unfortunately) remembers Asuma is around, _and _that he's a wind style specialist. "Hey, hey, Asuma-sensei! Can you teach me how to do that now?" He points excitedly at the chakra blades. "Since I've already mastered the first step, it should be a lot easier teaching me now? Whatd'ya say? Huh?"

This situation is a totally foreign one to Asuma. Not one of his students is this..._enthusiastic_…about training. Ever. "Well Naruto, I'm sure you can figure it out now." He answers, slouching back against a tree and pulling out a cigarette. "It's just concentrating your chakra in those blades. That's it. Visualize your chakra to be thin and sharp, and it will become like that. It's all you need to know."

Naruto nods and smiles. "Okay. And, you know what else is cool?" He adds excitedly. "Wind style is the rarest of the elements, right? So it's like we're special, or something." His smile widens. "It really feels cool, ya know? To be part of something like that. Like…we're both wind style, dattebayo! Wind style!"

Asuma blinks again. Then, he smiles too.

"Yup. Wind style."

* * *

><p><strong>9. <strong>"Can I ask you something?"

It starts out innocently enough. Sakura turns, an exasperated look on her face, hands coming to rest on her hips. "Naruto, I'm sorry, but I don't have time to…"

Naruto laughs. "Sakura, I'm not gonna ask you to go out for ramen." His eyebrows wriggle teasingly. "Although, if you're asking, I'm sure I could find some time for…"

She slugs him. Hard. "Very funny, Naruto. Ha ha. Seriously now, what is it? Lady Tsunade needs me as an assistant for an operation, and I'm running late as it is. So spill." Naruto's facial expression contorts for a brief moment, and then he's all smiles again. "Sakura, would you choose good or evil?"

He can't be serious. "Good, of course." She replies, brows crinkling as she pulls them into a frown. "What…?"

Naruto plows on. "Light or dark?"

"Light, but…"

"Okay, life or death?"

"Life , of course! May I…"

"How about..."

"Naruto!" Sakura is fuming now, eyes twitching. She is very close to pounding her teammate into paste. Orange gooey paste. "Look, if you're just going to bother me with stupid questions then stop it! That, or get to the point! What do you want?"

Naruto's face is uncharacteristically solemn, the smile having disappeared a long time ago. "Sakura, please, just answer my questions. Seriously." Sakura stares, and then rolls her eyes and nods. "Now," Naruto continues doggedly. "Joy or sorrow?"

Sakura is seriously confused now. "Joy…"

Naruto is staring intensely into her eyes, the deep blue of them managing to capture her own. "Sakura," He begins deliberately. "Naruto or Sasuke?"

Sakura's eyes widen, green irises stretching out so that the whites of her eyes all but vanish. Her jaw moves, her mouth opens.

Nothing comes out.

* * *

><p><strong>10. <strong>"Do you want to be my friend?"

"**Wh..WHAT?" **

The Kyuubi no Kitsune, the all-powerful nine-tailed demon fox, the king of all the bijuu, the most powerful being in the world, is stumped. Really and truly stumped, by a mere human child no more than thirteen years old. "Well?" The blond boy demands with a pout, crossing his arms over his chest and squinting into the dark depths of the cage. "Do you? It's a simple yes or no question. So…?"

The Fox is, frankly, baffled to a degree of surprised silence. He's never been asked that before. Not even Kushina has come up with such an outrageous notion. Conclusion: the child standing before him is an absolute idiot.

"Hey!" The boy's voice rings out piercingly, echoing around the sewer walls into the damp cage. "If you're quiet, that means yes!"

Kyuubi gnashes his teeth. How he would love to grind the little pest into a million tiny pieces. Then he would be free to unleash all the destruction and pain he desired. He can't even reach through the cage and attack the brat, for goodness's sake! Instead, here he is, being blackmailed into answering a stupid question for a stupid child. And this is indeed blackmail, because he doesn't want to be associated so familiarly with this kid. With him and his hosts, that just isn't _done_.

The boy doesn't seem get this. He stands, arms still crossed, tapping his foot impatiently and fixing the Fox with an infuriating stare that would _positively, absolutely _get him ripped apart for his insolence. If the Kyuubi were free, that is. He feels a sudden need to explain the situation to the child.

"**Look, kid." **The Fox begins hesitantly. **"That's going to be a no. I don't like you. In fact, I would very much like to kill you. Even if I didn't, a friendship would be impossible because first, you're my host, and second, I am a **_**demon**_**. We don't **_**do **_**casual acquaintances."**

The boy just grins. "Well, you can be the first! And anyway," he begins to count off on his fingers. "lots of people would like to kill me, many don't like me, and so what if I'm your host?" He rolls his eyes. "Is it, like, a _rule _that demons can't have friends? And you would actually follow them?" He shakes his head in mock disappointment. "I can't believe I have such a buzz-kill sealed up in me."

This is just ridiculous. **"Go away, kid." **The Kyuubi snaps, attempting to swat the annoyance away with his tails, but coming up just short of his target. **"I'll send you back. Just take some damn chakra or whatever you came for, but don't bother me with this nonsense again!"**

And with that, the boy is forcibly returned to the real world, but not without shouting a final "I'll be baaaack!" as he flies away down the tunnels to the conscious world.

Now alone and in peace, the Fox snorts. **"Of all the…" **He grumbles, settling down in his claustrophobic cage. **"That idiot child!" **But, strangely, there is a pleasant tickling in his stomach that has never been there before. He acts on it, and a small, chocked noise erupts from his throat and echoes around the sewer. The Fox stills, completely blown away. Is that…a _laugh_?

The Kyuubi is still well and truly stumped.

* * *

><p><strong>11. <strong>"Who are you?"

The blond's head is tilted to the side, a kind of reluctant curiosity shining in his cerulean eyes. Complete innocence and naivety is also present in Naruto's eyes, traits that he himself had once possessed a very long time ago.

Naruto Uzumaki is young, unaware, and utterly helpless. It would be so _easy _to get him right now. How pathetic. The village is really incredibly lax with their security. He is _not _impressed.

His partner nudges him. "What the hell are you waiting for?" The man hisses, prodding him in the shoulder with sharp elbows. "This is the perfect time to complete the job! I want to lop off a couple of limbs, here!"

The partner is soundly ignored. He stares into the blue eyes a second more, silently praying: _Come on, come on, hurry up! _He doesn't even know who he's talking to anymore, the boy or his bodyguard. He's appeared for another purpose entirely, but still…he doesn't want to involve anyone else if he can help it. _Hurry up. I can't keep this up for much longer_. His eyes swirl with red, the sharingan exposed for the kid to see. _Figure it out._

The jinchuuriki's eyes widen, and he's suddenly a lot more cautious. "Who are you?" He asks again, more than a little shaken now.

_You know, _Itachi thinks, grimly preparing for battle _I'd like to know that too, Naruto._

* * *

><p><strong>12. <strong>"Yeah, sure. When the _hell _did that guy do _anything _for me?"

Jiraiya frowns, the kind of frown that makes his eyebrows join above his forehead in an intimidating arc. "Hey, now." He warns, fighting the rage that is building up inside him. "Don't talk about things you don't understand."

The hurried steps beside him stop abruptly, and Jiraiya pauses too, glancing back at the kid. Naruto's fists are clenched, blond head bowed and limbs trembling. The dust that is gradually settling in his hair is a result of his screeching halt, and it somehow adds the picture of discontent that is his apprentice right now.

A small, mocking sound escapes Naruto's throat. He glances up through his bangs, eyes bitter and accusing. "Things I don't understand? Look here, _old man_," There's nothing even remotely friendly about the moniker this time. "don't go talking to me about things I "don't understand". Don't even bother trying. Either admit that you're wrong or _make _me understand. I've had enough of that crap."

Jiraiya bristles at the blatant disrespect. He crosses his arms, towering over the smaller boy. He'll take a lot of things from the squirt, but this is his limit. "Firstly," He growls. "I am your master for this trip. I am your superior. Show me some respect, or the training's off." He glares to emphasize his point. The boy merely huffs and rolls his eyes in a classic display of teenage behavior. "Second, we need to set some things straight." He kneels down to Naruto's level; this topic is much too delicate to discuss while employing intimidation tactics. "He was a good man. The Fourth…"

Naruto's head snaps up. "Don't." He hisses, grinding his teeth together harshly. "I've heard all of that already. He was a damn _hero,_ _my_ damn hero, and he saved the village at the cost of his own life, I know. There was nothing he could do. It was his _sacrifice_." There's a mocking quality to his words, and he isn't sounding at all like the Naruto Jiraiya knows well by now. "But you know what? I didn't ask for any of that power and trash. I never asked for any of it." The shaking hand now has droplets of blood running down its palms; his fingers have dug into them a little too hard. "And I have had enough of "not understanding". _You _will never understand what that _noble sacrifice _has done to me. I don't even know _why_ I was chosen at all."

This all needs to get out of his system. Jiraiya recognizes long-suppressed bitterness when he hears it, and again he is struck by how similar the two of them are. He glances back at the monument they had passed, a tribute to the Fourth Hokage that saved the Fire Country. The inscription makes him wince all over again. He can't say he appreciates the irony. "Look, Naruto." He breaks the silence, hating how little he is allowed to say to the one who deserves to know the most. "I can't make you understand. Not yet. But I will tell you one thing, all right? Just listen."

THE FOURTH HOKAGE…

"He never wanted this for you, to begin with…"

…SAVIOUR OF THE LEAF VILLAGE…

"But I will tell you one thing he did for you. Did you know that your very own Yondaime Hokage brought you into this world?" He grins. "He cut your umbilical cord himself, ya moron!"

Naruto's eyes widen.

…AND THE HERO WHO NEVER LEFT A MAN BEHIND

His hand creeps down to his belly button in reminder of the Fourth Hokage, in surprise at this single fact of life. It's neither a positive feeling, nor a negative one. It's not a satisfactory answer. Not even close.

But it's something.

For the first time, Naruto touches his stomach without thinking of the tenant that was placed there by his former hero.

And wonders.

* * *

><p><strong>13. <strong>"What's your last name?"

With a resounding _thunk_, her last weapon thuds into the tree bark, sliding into it with such force that the bark seems like butter. She turns, a little surprised at the sudden interruption. Then she blinks, even more surprised by the identity of the speaker. "Oh, hey Naruto! What was that?"

Naruto is dangling on a tree branch about five paces away from her current location. He is sprawled back on the sturdy trunk, arms and legs flung about as haphazardly as one can be on a branch. The stare he is exuding is piercing, only fueled by the intense curiosity in his eyes.

He blushes. Apparently, he hadn't meant to be seen. "Nothing, Tenten. Just thinking aloud, is all." He slides down further, and Tenten knows he'll fall off the tree if he continues on like this. "Get back to what you were doing." He says, flapping his arms like he can wave the question away. "I'll only be here a few more minutes."

Tenten grins cheekily. She strides over to the tree her comrade is lazing about in, and sends a powerful kick to the trunk. Naruto yelps and sits up, clinging to the branch for dear life. "Just ask, Naruto." She says, amused at his uncharacteristic shyness. "If you have something to say, say it."

Naruto tilts his head, eyes squinting, in an undeniable thinking pose before he decides to go for it. "What's your last name, Tenten?" His eyes shine, making his whole countenance vibrate from pure excitement and eagerness. "I mean, I've been thinking about it. I know everyone's full names except yours. So I've been trying to guess." He dangles from the branch, dangerously close to dropping off. "You're not the kid of a daimiyo, are you? Or the last survivor of a clan that's been wiped out? Or maybe the lost legacy of a super-powerful ninja that has only begun discovering the powers if their heritage?" He pauses, looking like he's felt like he said too much. "Are any of those right?"

Tenten feels a huge smile spread across her face. A second later, she has dashed up the tree trunk, coming to a rest with her face directly in front of blond preteen's. "Which of those do you think I am?" She asks, reaching out and tapping him on the nose. "Huh?"

Naruto squeaks with surprise, and promptly loses his footing on the branch, crashing onto the forest floor. He lays there, stunned but apparently unharmed. Tenten shakes her head, still amused. That was going to happen eventually.

She chuckles, and then jumps down and starts to collect her weapons, leaving a panicky Naruto yelling "Wait! I was right? Which is it?"

Tenten grins as she walks away, thinking fondly: _He's so adorable!_

* * *

><p><strong>14. <strong>"Is that…for _me?_"

He sounds more incredulous than surprised, really. His eyes bug out in disbelief and shock, and he stares at the little package that has just been placed idly into his palm.

Kakashi presses his (unseen) lips together in puzzlement. "Well, yes." He says blithely, a bit confused. "Who else who it be for?" He sticks his hands back into his pockets and slouches into his original, couldn't-care-less position. "I gave it to you, didn't I?" Naruto's eyes get even bigger. "Yeah," He admits after a beat, still gaping at the item in his palm as if unsure exactly what to do with it. "I guess so. Yeah."

There's another few minutes of unsure silence as Naruto slowly unwraps the package, face lighting up in a huge grin as he sees the new kunai he's been given. "Thanks!" He exclaims enthusiastically, jumping up and down in place, all hesitancy completely gone. His smile is only rivaled by his bright orange jumpsuit. Naruto goes in for a Naruto-esque tackle-hug but Kakashi sidesteps him quickly. "Uh, don't mention it." He replies hurriedly, leaning back against the hard wood of the bridge and taking care to be out of glomping distance.

Kakashi gives an (unseen) sideways glance at the rest of his team. They're dressed in dark colors; on Sasuke it doesn't make much of a difference, but on Sakura it really shows, contrasting sharply with her bright pink hair and green eyes. She seems a little startled, if her blatant staring is anything to go by. She looks a bit ruffled too, fidgeting slightly with the black fabric of her skirt uncomfortably. Sasuke is a little less obvious about it, throwing tiny sideways glances at the others and wandering a little further away from his team than he usually would. It's an awkward silence, and Kakashi wonders all of a sudden what kind of conversation occurred between his team before he showed up.

Kakashi's mouth twitches in an (unseen) realization as he gives the other two another look. He reaches out one hand and lazily places it on the startled pre-teen's blond hair.

"Happy Birthday, Naruto."

The smile is small, but it's there. "Yeah, Kakashi-sensei. Thanks."

* * *

><p><strong>15. <strong>"Isn't this a great day?"

Gaara nods, red hair brushing against the back of a very blond head. "Hmm." He answers simply, leaning back a little more and closing his eyes. This is _relaxing_, even if he doesn't care to admit it. This is really, really relaxing.

He can practically hear the grin in Naruto's voice as he says "Don't get much time off when you're Kazekage, huh? Although, you can't beat Konoha if you want weather like this!" He leans back a little more, heaving a contented sigh. "They weren't kidding when they called your village "Hidden in the Sand", and you poor souls have it all year long!" He chuckles, shaking his head in mock horror.

"Hmm." Gaara mutters, not taking the bait. He's too relaxed right now.

Another moment passes, with the wind blowing in a way that was _just right_, the best temperature he could imagine and at just the right speed…

"Bet'cha wishing you're _Konohan_, huh? Well, even if you were you could just forget about that Kage position, 'cause I would _so _beat you to that." Naruto heaves another big sigh. "So yeah. Forget about it. What an awesome day! I wish every day would be like this one, I really do." He suddenly seems to realize something, and squirming, he asks. "Hey, Gaara?"

Gaara gives a small sigh. "Hmm?"

"Is the Hokage Monument on your side?" Naruto asks excitedly, starting to turn. "'cause I wanna…" What he wants to say is completely forgotten as Gaara grabs his arm, stilling his movement. Naruto freezes, giving him a questioning glance.

"Don't move." Gaara says tiredly, almost floppily shoving Naruto's arm back to him. "Just…stay where you are, okay? This is perfectly fine." Naruto blinks, smiles and then sinks back onto his place, back-to-back with Gaara, overlooking the Konoha hills.

Gaara relaxes again, staring up at the darkening sky. The two watch in a companionable silence as the sun sets, staining the sky deep purples and reds, spreading slowly into an deep, rich navy blue. Wispy clouds slowly make their way across the sky to block the moonlight, never visible, and make their way across the dark expanse, creating a thick, fluffy world above. Gaara admires every subtle change in the sky, every color and appreciates the break from duty. He's never really done this before. Plus, it's _relaxing_. He never wants to go inside again.

"Hey, Gaara?"

Gaara sighs again. "Hmm?"

"Is this a good time to tell you that the weather forecast predicted rain tonight?"

* * *

><p><strong>16. <strong>"Let's see…what do I think of you, really?"

An impassive face stares back, as if unaffected by the question.

Finger meets chin as it is tapped in thought. "Nothing to say about that, huh? Well, that's okay. It was more of a rhetorical question anyway. To tell you the truth, I'm kind of confused." The speaker chuckles, running a hand through his blond hair sheepishly. "Weird for me to admit, I know. But I am. I just need to…clear things up, you know?" He looks up at the listener intently. "I've talked to you for years, but things are different now. Follow me?"

No answer. His expression stays the same; solemn and serious, with an undertone of respectful distance.

The speaker plows on without a second thought. "Everything's changed now." He says simply. "Ever since I finally got the headband, it's like my life has done an about-turn in the opposite direction. I'm loving it now, I feel like it was always meant to be this way." He sighs. "But there are some things I've discovered that I don't really want to think about, ever. Like you, for example. No offense."

None is taken, apparently, as silence is the only answer he is given.

"Look," Naruto exhales, shaking his head. "I don't like the situation you've put me in, okay? I think I might understand later, but now isn't the time to discuss this with you." He stands up abruptly, brushing the dirt off his orange pants and staggers back a little. "It's time for me to focus on getting stronger." He says, staring off into the distance. "You're right. I have to hold this off until I do. I _will _ask about this later, though. You can count on it."

He turns around, kicking stones as he walks back to the direction of his apartment, the setting sun throwing rays at his back. "Goodbye." He says softly, as if to himself. "You've been a good listener. But I don't think I need you now. Not anymore."

The stone head of the Fourth Hokage of Konoha continues its vigil over the village, completely unaware of his most frequent visitor's final farewell.

* * *

><p><strong>17. <strong>"Where do you get these?"

Naruto asks the question with considerable difficulty, as he is currently rolling on the floor, clutching his stomach in laughter. He takes a large gasp of breath and surfaces, rubbing at the tear tracks on his cheeks. "Where do you get these jokes?" He chokes out again.

Kiba grins. "Well," He begins, setting himself down on the ground next to his now-hiccupping friend. "My sister's fifth boyfriend worked in a bar, you see." He begins, a mischievous look growing in his eyes. "And we had a "Your Mama" battle of epic proportions. We were fighting over my sister's honor, and the loser would get the ultimate wedgie and have their head dunked down the can. He had all this great material, and I was losing quickly…"

Naruto is hanging on to his every word. "And…?" The blond preteen asks eagerly, eyes widening as he leans forward in anticipation. "What happened?"

Kiba lifts up a finger. "So," He continues slowly, drawing out all the suspense that he could manage. "I was on my last nerve, it was the final round, and I knew I could never turn the outcome around in my favor. And then…" He throws his hands up in the air, making Naruto start in surprise. "BAM! I saw Ino's face in my mind, and it was just the inspiration I needed to make the final joke and win!" He lifts his hands up in a victory sign, grinning smugly. "And ever since, I have been known as the "King of Jokes"."

Naruto's eyes go wide. "Wow…" He breathes. "That's so cool! That's why you're so good with jokes!" He's starting to get excited, and Kiba just grins wider at his gullibility. "Ha! We could totally own everyone in the village with your joking skills! We could…" He breaks off suddenly, staring suspiciously at Kiba's mischievous grin and putting two and two together. Naruto's face pulls up into a sulky pout.

"Very funny, you liar."

* * *

><p><strong>18. <strong>"So, um….where's yours?"

Killer Bee's eyebrow quirks up. "Say _wha?_" He exclaims, turning to his young jinchuuriki-protégé. "What are you talkin' about? Say what's on your mind or get out!" He raps, ending with an epic pose. "Oh yeah!"

Naruto raises his hand to the back of his head and rubs it sheepishly. "Umm, well," He begins, voice devoid of any of his usual confidence. "I mean…we're both demon hosts, right? So we both have…" He trails off, his hands making little flipping motions. "You know?" He finishes, eyes screwing up in an attempt to make his friend understand what he is saying.

The question mark hovering above Killer Bee's head is so evident it is almost visible. "I don't know what you're talking about!" The eight-tails jinchuuriki exclaims, scratching his head. He suddenly catches himself and adds a (late) "Yo!"

Naruto sighs, seemingly reaching a decision. He stands up and quickly unzips his jacket, pulling off his fishnet undershirt a second later. Killer Bee just watches in bewilderment as Naruto pulls his hand in a sign, closing his eyes in concentration. Blue chakra swirls around his form and a dark pattern of swirls appears on his stomach. He opens his eyes and gestures towards it. "This is mine." He says, a little awkwardly, a little proudly. "How 'bout you? Where's your seal?"

Unseen eyes widen in understanding as Killer Bee shrugs up his right shoulder, showing Naruto a dark pattern there. "That's the Iron Armor Seal." He says, grinning widely. "It's certainly looks weaker than your seal, but mine is awesomer." Naruto gives him a disbelieving look, but is smiling now, less tense than he was a few seconds ago. "I don't think so."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah!"

Killer Bee smirks. "Then work on controlling your bijuu, show 'im who's boss! Maybe then I'll consider you worthy of…uh…"

"Loss? Cross?" Naruto suggests playfully, voice muffled as he pulls his shirt back on.

"Whatever." Killer Bee shrugs, displaying his seal again. "Just work hard, do your best and then we will compete with our bijuu powers! Yosh!"

Naruto salutes, his face now broken into a big grin. "Sir, yes sir!"

* * *

><p><strong>19. <strong>"When are you going to grow up?"

Konohamaru sticks his tongue out at Naruto sullenly, balking at the frustrated question. "Shut up, boss! I skip school when I want to; you did that all the time when you were my age! Plus, I skipped for a good cause, I was training! So there!"

Naruto looks angry, Konohamaru notices with surprise. He actually looks _angry_. "I don't care, Konohamaru! Just because I used to do something when I was your age doesn't mean that you have to do it! Training is _not _a good excuse for skipping!" He sighs, running his hand through his blond hair. "Jeez, Konohamaru! I thought you were smarter than this! Do you think that skipping school for _two weeks straight _is a good thing for the Third's grandson to do? For a _future Hokage_ to do? Do you?"

Konohamaru is indignant at being addressed like this. How _dare _Naruto tell him this stuff after everything _he_ had done when he was in the Academy? "Don't tell me that!" He yells back, face turning red with anger. "Who do you think you are? You sound like Iruka-sensei! It's not fair! You can't yell at me like that! Don't tell me what to do!"

Another exasperated sigh emerged from Naruto. He clenches his fists and stands up, opening his mouth and ready to yell his heart out. Konohamaru folds his arms tightly on his chest, waiting, with a stubborn look on his face. _I won't back down!_

Suddenly, Naruto's fists slacken, his mouth snaps shut, and all the anger leaves his body with an audible _whump_. "Ok." He says tiredly, visibly backing off from the confrontation. "Look, you're right. I can't force you to do anything, but please…" He looks straight into Konohamaru's eyes, trying to appear less condescending. "…don't make the same mistakes I did, all right? The whole point of having a boss is to learn from their mistakes. So learn from mine. Go to school."

Konohamaru humphs and looks away. "I'll think about it."

Naruto looks about ten years older. "Ok. All right. Ok, fine. Just…do what you think is best. Listen to your conscience. Please?" Without sticking around for an answer, Naruto hops back into the trees and disappears, leaving an upset, muddled and reflective Konohamaru behind.

It's their first ever argument. It won't be their last.

* * *

><p><strong>20. <strong>"Why?"

Sasuke doesn't respond to the question. Half of his face, the one that had the pattern spread out on his cheek, lifts in a small smile. His curse-stained eye gleams with a frightening madness as he lifts up a hand to wipe off a splatter of water on his cheek.

This disturbs Naruto more than he would ever admit. Shaking the water from his own hair, he repeats the question through clenched teeth. "Why?"

Sasuke straightens up from his crouch slowly, flipping his hair back and away from his face. Naruto waits for an answer, trying his best to remain _calm _and _patient _and trying to get over the _confusion _that was filling him up and spilling over…

He can't take it anymore. Throwing his head back, Naruto yells out his anger, pouring all his feelings and questions into one word. "WHY?"

Glancing across the valley that separated them, Sasuke coolly evaluates the distance without giving an indication that he had heard Naruto at all. Shifting in battle stance, he lunges forward to attack without a word, the deranged smile still lingering on his face.

* * *

><p><strong>END<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>(AN: This was total random plot bunny that popped up :) Sorry for the**** detour from my other stories, I really wanted to write this. Think of it as a little present to make up for my long absence, school is really sucking right now. And yes, I realize that some of these are kind of OOC (like the one with Sakura…that was written on a whim), would never happen or are completely random and silly. But I think they all reflect different aspects of Naruto's character, and some should be taken in a more figurative sense.**

**Anywhos, I adore these 20-truths format stories, and I will write more if you guys request it. Please REVIEW if you have any questions, critiques or comments, or if you just want to say something. I would really appreciate it :) They make my day!)**


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